Playgrounds

It’s one of those days when you just want to hit a playground with the kids to let them burn off energy. Hopefully, the weather is nice, there’s a park nearby, and you can spend a bit of time both playing and relaxing. Do some chin ups on the monkey bars, let your inner child free on the swings, bring a book and find a shady spot, and catch up on your Words With Friends moves.

But if you live somewhere with seasons, or rain, or snow, or sweltering heat, or… let’s face it… anywhere on EARTH, sometimes the playground just isn’t a good destination. And that’s sad. Because the times when you need it most are the times when the conditions might not be favorable to outdoor mucking about.

Neptune Park in Utah sure is cool, but could use some shade!

Oh sure, there are indoor mall playgrounds crowded with whiny kids and fast food joints with germ-laden molded plastic climbing structures harboring the odd moldy french fry (oh yeah, those things are so fake they can’t grow mold before we’re molding ourselves six feet under). Libraries don’t welcome anyone with vocal chords. And while we all enjoy a refreshing hike in the woods, sometimes the planning involved--5 waterbottles, snacks, hats, lugging half the branches of the forest around as walking sticks--is more than I’m in the mood for.

Sometime during the last decade, most of the good playgrounds in this country were demolished and the plots of land possessed by demonic photocopies of brightly painted metal play structures that are pretty much the same whether you’re in Savannah or Seattle. Apparently, one kid got a splinter from real wood on a kickass Camelot castle playground, some asshole must’ve sued the town or the school or the landowner, and since then, every playground like it was summarily replaced by a replica of AnyPlaygroundUSA. Boring! Enough with the cookie cutter “creative play boosters!” I want splinters and recycled tires and sand in my shoes! (Do a Google image search for "castle playground" and you'll be BLOWN AWAY... go on, do it!) Here are a few of the simpler ones:

Jamie Bell Adventure Playground

Where did all the good playgrounds go??

Other countries have a lot more of them. Some still lurk in the corners of a few lucky towns (like my favorite in nearby Sherborn, MA), but I suspect their lives are numbered. Backyard cedar (or made-to-look-like-cedar) playgrounds are all the rage. I mean, I get it. Wood doesn’t stand up to a few hundred kids clamoring over them all day, nor do they always weather the weather well.

What would I want in a playground?

• Cover. Some sort of shield from rain and sun and snow. A gazebo, stone & wood shelter, canvas tent. Something. And bonus if there’s a covered section of the play structure itself, so it can be used year round but still benefit from the fresh air.
  
  
  
  This sheltered playground in Japan may look like the stomach of an alien, but wow!
  
  
• Trees. I am so tired of playgrounds without foliage! The coolest ones are the playgrounds where the trees are a play structure themselves, or part of it. But they also add shade in the summer, as well as dramatic play prop extraordinaire: leaves!
  
  
• Water. I don’t care if it’s a splash park, sprinkler, fountain, brook, or a Japanese garden. Water adds such a dimension to the beauty and creative play options of any park. It’s hard to convince towns to spend the money or take the risk, though they're gaining popularity. Hooray!
  
  
  
  Unique Water Playground in Chicago
  
  
• Picnic. There’s got to be a comfortable picnic spot. Grass to spread out a blanket on (enough of the annoying woodchips that get caught in your sandals and stay trapped to fleece fabric like burrs). Picnic tables. A mud pie bar. A garden suitable for a tea party. Big natural boulders (there’s a cool playground that is mostly a field of rocks in Belmont, MA). And don’t forget trash barrels that actually get emptied more than once per season!
  
  
• Sandbox. It may sound simple, but most new playgrounds are completely lacking in sand! Come on! What are kids going to fill their buckets with again and again, drive their trucks through, and build castles and Tatooine landscapes with?!
  
  
• Sports. Many playgrounds seem to be lacking in activities for older kids or the more competitively inclined. Don’t forget to add a basketball court, wall ball divider, net for volleyball or badminton, or a few stone chess tables.
  
  
• Skatepark. Just do it. Include these for the “big kids.” Get over the insurance hurdles and put in more skateparks. They rule.
  
  
  
  St. Kilda Adventure Playground in Australia is a recycled dream park!
  
  

So tell me what you would want in a playground? Do you have any hidden gems in your neighborhood? I’d love to build a state by state list of out of the ordinary and FREE playspaces. More indoor destinations, like The Commons in Columbus, Indiana would be such a relief during the cold weather months. I want to be able to say "Go play!" with confidence!

Sleep Habits

Sleep is such a controversial subject in the US. There are a ton of really crappy books out there promising to solve you or your child’s sleep problems. Some of them don’t work, and many are just plain cruel or downright dangerous.

Once I am asleep, I prefer to sleep alone. Meaning, I don’t want anyone in too close a proximity to me during deep sleep. But I wake for various reasons throughout the night, and when I have someone else in bed with me, it is far easier to fall asleep again. Guess what, that’s biologically normal. And I’m an adult. Babies who sleep with their mothers are healthier. It is the biological norm to sleep and breastfeed throughout the night for an infant mammal. But much of the sue-happy Western society has convinced people otherwise.

If you want to learn what human animals are actually doing while sleeping and how sleep behavior works, you sure as heck shouldn’t look to someone who stands to make a lot of money off the subject (as with just about anything). James J. McKenna will change the way you think about sleeping with your baby. If you’re more of an auditory learner, listen to James McKenna speak about the biology of infant sleep here to get a quick idea of what I’m referring to. Bottom line, children can learn to sleep just fine on their own, and so can adults, but babies are supposed to sleep with their mothers. Period.

Sounds like I’m lecturing? Hell, yes. I actually despised co-sleeping. I did it because it is the best thing for my babies’ sleep. Did I keep them in my bed until they went to school? Hell, no. Once they were maturationally ready to breathe reliably on their own and physiologically able to go longer stretches at night without nursing, then I began to slowly nightwean so that I could regain the sleep environment that I wanted.

My personal strategy may be a topic for another time. But my basic approach was to breastfeed in an unlimited fashion for the first six months throughout the night. The next six months I worked on slooowwwwwwwwly increasing the time between nighttime feedings until they were almost eliminated by a year old. Sure, there would be backslides due to teething or a cold on occasion, but I was consistent. I lost a lot more sleep than just nightnursing on demand or cold-tofu nightweaning would have gained. But it was respectful of both the baby’s needs and my own. It was an equitable compromise. And by 12-15 months old, each of my very different children slept through the night, no crying and whining. To me, it was successful.

So, fast forward 5-10 years. I wake up to pee a few times per night if I drink too much hot cocoa (or anything) within the few hours before bed, and at least once regardless. My metabolism is high and healthy and it’s normal for adults to wake during the night too. I often wake around 4am and have trouble going back to sleep. My mind gets alert quickly, I have vivid dreams most nights that I wake up to ponder or take notes on, and often I think about stressful stuff.

Well, guess what? When my kids are with me, piled into bed (nowadays by necessity in a small apartment) I can fall asleep again more quickly. On those luxurious nights when I am with my boyfriend, I can fall asleep immediately and sleep blissfully through most of the night. Even he will sometimes fall asleep wrapped around me, snoring gently, peacefully breathing, until after a normal initial 45 minute sleep cycle, we rouse briefly and roll our separate ways for deeper sleep as we both prefer it. But throughout the night, I’ll feel a squeeze of my hand, a kiss on my shoulder, a pat on my back...his ways of making a connection so that he can fall back to sleep more easily. And at that 4am wakeful hour, I’ll do something similar, and then collapse right into unconsciousness again most of the time. Similarly, with a kid (or four) nearby, it might be one rolling into me, just quick skin contact, before zonking out again. This is normal healthy human behavior. For adults, children, or infants, this is simple biology and body chemistry at work. There is no reason that we should accept this attached behavior in adults, but eschew it for an immature infant!

As for my sleeptalkers (and I’ve done plenty of that myself), that’s another issue! What a fun topic to explore in the future. And some funny stories too.

So tell me, how have you successfully respected your child(ren)’s biological sleep needs while maintaining your sanity? How do you get a good night’s sleep? Any tricks of the trade that aren’t in most of “the books”? How do you deal with well-meaning people who clearly know nothing about human sleep biology who preach the American “back to sleep” crib approach, or Ferberizing, or worse? There’s a lot of information to be gleaned from any “sleep book”, good or bad. But for new parents, it’s hard to tell them apart. If something promises a quick fix, like anything in life, it’s likely too good to be true.

Skipping School

When I was a kid, my parents thoroughly believed that I learned far more out in the real world than I did at school. And I agree. While kids learn all sorts of good things (and bad things) at school, most of the learning that they will use in life they glean from everyday experience.

While our kids might choose a career where algebra or economics will be essential to their success, I will argue that almost every child will use skills they learn outside of school far more. The time we spend teaching them to put away their clothes, cook a casserole, or clean the toilet, is going to be far more useful. Taking them to the bank and teaching them about money, letting them help you with your own work, or going for a walk and letting the conversation take a tangent on traffic patterns, trash pickup, or the tensile strength of titanium carbide is going to be far more rewarding long term, and more likely to be remembered.

I understand the need for public school in our current societal model. I do. The teachers work their butts off. But really, it is publicly funded day care. Most of us want our children to go somewhere. Many of us need our children to go somewhere so we can work and clean the house and not crawl into the gutter voluntarily with rabid rats to avoid completely losing our sanity and sense of self.

If I could handle it, I’d homeschool. If I could afford it, I’d choose a Sudbury model school (the original Sudbury Valley School is two miles away). It’s actually not expensive as far as private schools go, but I’m not in the financial position to school my kids as I was schooled. I went to both public and private schools, and my parents made sure I missed the maximum “allowable” days in order to travel and soak in culture and reality.

In my mind, I think my kids benefit from learning the basics with the expertise of their teachers, instead of at my more than capable hands, simply because they are gaining exposure to other people’s styles of education and interaction. By the time half of elementary school is over, I feel they could confidently go out into the world with the tools to learn anything they need to know on their own. They can read, write, and are encouraged to think and draw their own conclusions.

I grow tired of the “social interaction” excuse many people use for not homeschooling, or for choosing to enroll their kids in extracurricular activities. Most classes group kids by age. This in no way reflects interactions in the real world, where we are expected to get along with people of all ages and backgrounds. Twenty ten year olds in a room is one of the most unnatural social congregations I can think of. Or twenty toddlers?! Good lords, no. How do we expect a toddler to learn social graces from OTHER TODDLERS?! Regardless, in most schools, kids are rarely given the opportunity to be mentored by children older than themselves, nor the opportunity to mentor others, both of which are valuable positions where more than academics is learned. I can think of no bigger educational loss (besides no education at all) than to spend a childhood trapped exclusively in a homogenous classroom. Which is why I welcome opportunities to say yes to any child’s request to skip school.

So when it’s a simple case of a child of mine wanting to stay home on his birthday, you’d better believe I honor that request. You’d probably want to stay home from work on your birthday, right? Or go do something out of the ordinary? Spend it with friends or family doing something you love? Those are the experiences you remember and savor and talk about in decades to come. And I’ll bet if you think back, you can even remember learning something that you couldn’t have learned in school.

What are your views on school if you send your kids to school? If you homeschool, would you consider sending your kids to school if certain things were done differently in typical public schools? How were you schooled and how do you wish you were schooled? As a society, what sorts of educational opportunities do you feel benefit children (future adults!) the most?

Punishment vs. Discipline

When I hear a parent ask: What should the punishment be for X? My blood starts to boil. I want to ask in return: What good will punishment do? Will it prevent the behavior from recurring in the future? Does punishment help you when you do something wrong? Is it logical?

For many, it's simply an issue of semantics. Some people use the terms punishment and discipline interchangeably. Just as often, some people misuse the term discipline when they mean punishment. Regardless, I have an issue with punishment. Life is full of punishment! As if it weren't already enough, most of us heap extra on ourselves, often inadvertently.

Punishment is usually not a logical consequence of a given behavior. It does not teach, it only chastises. For example, say you are speeding (whether you feel it is warranted or not). You get pulled over. The cop slaps you with a $100 ticket. Did it teach you anything? Only that you shouldn't get caught speeding (and that maybe you can’t afford it financially). It taught you nothing about why speeding wasn't a good idea, except that cops are out to get you, usually not because your driving was unsafe, but because they have a quota to meet. It's their jobs.

Now, if they had really wanted to teach you why it was unsafe (and most of the time it is safe, that's the problem--hello, Autobahn and countries without speed limits), they would do something else. To discipline means to teach. If someone wanted to teach me why my speed was too excessive to be safe, I would be spoken to, logically, exhaustively, sincerely, then maybe issued a summons to a class about driver safety, or asked to take a written test proving I understand why my actions were unacceptable. I would be disciplined, not punished. And I would have far more respect for law enforcement, instead of viewing them as largely an inconvenience and a nuisance.

So your child does something wrong. You want to do something about it. That's a common feeling. But stop. Think about it. What are you trying to accomplish? Make sure you’re being the grownup. Make certain you’re not just feeding a need for revenge. Maybe her behavior was annoying, painful, embarrassing, inconvenient. How often do you mistakenly do something that fits one of those descriptions? This is a child we’re talking about after all. We’re not perfect, yet we expect them to be? Hardly. So first, put it in perspective. We often ask more of our own children than we do of other adults. Not fair. And not realistic.

So your child embarrassed you the grocery store. Do you threaten to take away her Nintendo for a week? Or do you present a logical consequence instead? The latter might be refusing to run errands with her for a week. A pain in the butt, possibly. But on your next errand, you might have done something enjoyable, or chosen your favorite cereal instead of hers. Point that out. Sure, flaunt it a little, enjoying your cereal while she has to choose between your quinoa twigs and a boring piece of flax toast for breakfast. Those are the things that are going to make her think, and hopefully change her behavior in the store next time around. They are the same sorts of situations we encounter as adults, just simplified. But someone saying we can’t do something completely unrelated to what we did wrong isn’t going to help us, it’s only going to piss us the hell off. There’s not going to be any growth, and possibly even the opposite.

But back to the fact that none of us are perfect. Sometimes we just can’t think fast enough to come up with an appropriate consequence. Sometimes we fuck up and say something stupid, or even mean (maybe we just had a shitty day at work and have no more patience left--our emotional battery is fracking empty). Here’s what we can do. Talk about it. Include our children in discussions about discipline. Often their ideas about a consequence are going to be harsher than our own! Screwed up? Fucking apologize! Don’t you feel better when someone apologizes to you? Model that behavior if you want your kids to learn it.

Have trouble forgetting not to raise your voice? That can be a bad habit. Try getting down on their level and even whispering instead. It almost always takes a child by surprise. And they have to concentrate harder to listen, which can be a good thing.

Whatever the heck happens, don’t call them names, tell them they’re bad (or good for that matter--their behavior might be bad, but they aren’t), or lash out physically. If you can’t keep your cool, WALK AWAY. Unless it’s an absolute emergency, no harm will come from taking five minutes to chill the hell out. That’s what I use time outs for--for me and them--a needed opportunity to regroup and get back in control of my own behavior. It’s not going to do my children’s behavior a darned bit of good if my behavior is crappy to boot. 

When you don’t know what to do, just take a step back. Be objective. Try to put yourself in your child’s position. What would help you? What wouldn’t help you? Figure out your goal. Make a plan to help change a behavior and stick to it for a while, even if it’s harder. It’ll pay off in the long run. Be consistent. And be reasonable.

If you dole out an illogical consequence, don’t expect them to like it, and certainly don’t expect them to learn from it. Life is tough enough as it is without us dealing out punishment or consequences that make no sense. Take a moment to think and we can level our parenting kung fu up a notch. Or better yet, stay a step ahead and help your child avoid behavior pitfalls in the first place, and point out their successes (which are your successes too!).

So tell me, when have you fucked up royally in the discipline department? What did you do about it? How about a really successful consequence? I think one of my biggest challenges was when my second child lied to his third grade teacher about doing some homework. The logical consequence ended up being that he had to work for three hours two days in a row completely redoing the project to get it done in time, plus write a letter to the teacher about what happened (I would never demand he apologize, just that he communicate about it promptly). 

From infancy to adulthood, it doesn’t really get easier, it just changes. It’s another challenge of parenting, and there are lots of right ways and lots of wrong ways to do it. I personally think punishment is one of the wrong ways. What do you think?

40

So, I turned 40 yesterday. Holy crap.
For the past 10 years, my kids thought I was 25. Not because I didn't want them to know how old I really was, but because I liked being 25. I simply said I was turning 25 for the Nth time. I had also given up on anyone remembering or celebrating my birthday because it had been forgotten so many times in the past, or recognized in a very half-assed way during my marriage that I preferred to avoid it. Not expecting anything left less chance of disappointment.

This year I wanted to have a joint party with my boyfriend who also turned 40 this month. But he lives far away. So instead we celebrated on our own while he was on a business trip. I sent him an Edible Arrangement beforehand, and made him vegan butterfingers and bought a few other tiny odds and ends. He got me a couple of cute awesome little gifts as well that were just perfect, considering he had already bought one of them and then I sent him a pic of something I liked and it turned out that was one of the things he had already gotten for me. :)

Today, I treated myself to a $10 Sea Shuttle cruise (plus $5 donation to the Trustees of Reservations) to Misery Island (no really, that's the name of it, read my second Salem novel, Salem's Purgatory), and a vegan pizza from Flying Saucer Pizza Co.

Last year my kids puzzled out my real age. It was fun watching their astonishment at how old I was. Of course they don't really care how old I am. I wish I could have had a cake though. Maybe one from the Chicago Diner (om nom nom) or Hippie Chick Bakery or Cafe Indigo. Or have someone actually bake me a homemade cake. People still do that, right??

I did a few things I've never done before, because, well, isn't that what you're supposed to do when you turn 40?! I tried fried pickles, went to Hooters, did something at 30K feet that I will remain vague about, and today I drove a 45 foot cruise boat in Salem Sound. The other passenger of the boat coincidentally had her 50th birthday yesterday. Fun times all around.

So, yeah. 40. Better to turn 40 than not turn 40!

Messing with Texas

I’m in Texas right now. Technically, I’ve been to Texas before. But I was 10. We were driving through the Panhandle (which BTW is farther north than “North Texas” in case you needed to know). And I was in the backseat blowing through C sized batteries playing portable PacMan. So I’ve not really seen Texas before.

I could make out the Gulf of Mexico as my plane descended. Ten miles visibility and hazy in the early morning heat. Palm trees in the median strips. A slight hint of salt water in the air if you are paying attention. And there are cars and hot pavement and every retail chain store typical of homogenous middle America lining the roadsides.

The lone occupant of the economy shuttle van, I watched the Lone Star landscape pass by. My reticent driver cranked Michael Jackson’s Beat It and--what I have learned is typical of Houston drivers--relies solely on GPS because he has no sense of direction or knowledge of the suburban streets. I never figured out why he opened a new disposable straw for his iced coffee three times on the fifteen minute route. I only know, as an outsider, I’m not supposed to “mess with Texas.”

Oh, but I would love to. The population whines about hating to drive, yet they drive everywhere. Rental cars turned out to cost a small fortune (and don’t accept debit cards for reservations), and there are no options here such as ZipCar, SideCar, or Lyft. There is a single rail line, and slow bus service. The only modern option in transportation appears to be the Hail A Cab app with slow, expensive, and spotty service.

What do you have against public transportation, Texas? Indeed, this seems to be a bigger problem plaguing most of the United States. While other countries add rail service and greener group options, this country seems to be fighting with itself in the ring, creating more barriers to affordable, reliable, eco-friendly transport. Our rail system is slow and antiquated. Our highways are choked with traffic, yet we dump federal funding into “fixing” them. Bike lanes are few. Our largely obese, inactive population stuffs themselves into one quarter of a metal box on wheels that relies on combustible petroleum products, idles at a dozen stoplights, finally arrives at work to sit for hours in front of computers or attends meetings about how to be more productive team players.

But at least we have Starbucks, right? No matter where I go, I know I can get my hot mocha made with soy milk. I know I should bring a sweater in July because the air conditioning works overtime. And I know the wifi won’t work reliably (so I’ll always get work done) but I have my phone with 4G if I truly need to look something up.

This reliance on knowing what to expect no matter where we go pacifies our fear of change. It’s a delicious crutch on our quest for constant comfort in the guise of progressive culture. And while we might choose to resist individual incarnations of this conformist capitalism--boycotting WalMart, Exxon, Monsanto-born produce, or Nestle products--almost all of us have our personal weaknesses. And yes, I’m admitting my biggies: Starbucks (even if it’s only a few times per month), hair conditioner (my gods, have you ever tried to brush hair like mine?!), and bottled water (those big two gallon jugs with the spout that sit in the fridge because I just cannot stand the taste of most tap water and cannot afford the reverse osmosis filter system of my dreams (plus I’m renting right now)).

Vote? Because every person counts. Well, I’m going to propose that your purchases speak louder than politics. If everyone stopped buying Crest toothpaste (they test on animals, innocent cute fluffy bunnies, smear that chemical-laden crap in their eyes in the name of “safety”) then it would disappear from the shelves… or the company would find out why people stopped buying their products and likely change to stay afloat, because it’s about making money, after all, not cleaning your pearly whites (you only need a bit of baking soda to do that if push comes to shove). Or how about McDonald’s… it’s convenient, fast, and many of them have a play structure. But, um, they won’t commit to making sure an animal is actually dead before they begin dismembering it. Come on. Can even the most callous carnivore honestly say that they think that’s right? If people just chose Burger King, Wendy’s, or Subway instead--and took their kids to the playground to eat their crappy picnic lunches--McDonald’s might start to get the first inkling of their shit together. But they won’t. Because people can’t be bothered to cross the street to the competitor that doesn’t put seventeen ingredients into their french fries (including dimethylpolysiloxane, an antifoaming agent, WTF).

It is hard to support local businesses when monster retail chains deliver familiar products we want at good prices. There has to be a happy medium. Don’t go to WalMart? What if everyone who went to WalMart to buy toothpaste only bought Tom’s of Maine brand? Likely, WalMart would start stocking more natural oral hygiene products and other merchandise targeting the “I don’t want to brush my teeth with chemicals I can’t pronounce” demographic. But it’s WalMart! WalMart sucks! (oh wait, that’s KMart, thanks, Rainman.) I don’t think boycotting WalMart is in itself going to solve their internal hiring protocols and craptastic treatment of employees. If you want to make a difference, teach the employees how to demand better wages and benefits. Volunteer your time and help someone less fortunate land a better job or teach them a skill they’d need to do so. Or be a source of better alternatives for employment, so people will have better options. Some people can’t afford to purchase the same products elsewhere for more money. They go to WalMart. So teach them about the thrift store, or how to sew, or teach a free or discounted computer class at the local technical institution. But put your efforts into avenues that will help create upward spirals of change instead of stifling real progress.

And that’s where social progressiveness becomes key. Open-mindedness. Why we have to start at the beginning. With our own children. Model for them. When we do something we’re not proud of, or make a choice that isn’t necessarily ideal, explain why. Can’t kick that Twizzlers habit? Keep them out of sight, except maybe on the odd holiday. Couldn’t afford a new hybrid car? (I couldn’t either.) Teach your kids why, try to use public transportation, and get them interested in supporting greener alternatives or researching them for a school project. Still smoke? For goodness sake, don’t do it inside around your kids, but talk to them openly about how you know how unhealthy it is and hope that they never start. When you can’t or aren’t willing to model well, teach with facts, even if it makes you uncomfortable. Turn to others for help. Instill in your children the values you wish you were brought up with, even if those habits are hard to change now.

Sure, I might grab a couple of tacos from Taco Bell while traveling (fresco style, beans instead of beef, please). None of us are perfect, no matter how hard we try or how much sunshine we blow into our Facebook statuses. But what we can do is strive to improve our own habits, starting with how we choose to spend our money. Because money talks. Politics is money. Be competitive with yourself if you want to make a difference. Because others will notice. And some may ask why you do what you do. And some might even choose to make the same changes. And you and those close to you will benefit regardless. Every day. Try to be better than you were yesterday. No matter how insignificant it seems. I know it may seem like a losing battle, but we will most certainly lose if we don’t try.

So as I sit here drinking my bottled water, charging my phone in the NASA Springhill Suites complimentary in-room iPhone dock while using their free wifi, eating my second breakfast of a tortilla covered with a fast food packet of salsa verde while my boyfriend finishes his HPSS training at IBM, I am grateful for even being able to recognize these luxuries. I have the ability to take a break, take a step back, and be critical of my own consumption. While better than most, it’s far from perfect. I am using electricity flowing through the massive ugly powerline towers outside the window, undoubtedly originating from unsustainable coal plants, utilizing oil to grease the outdated machinery. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to instead see a field of solar panel towers? Or wind turbines? Or better yet, a hotel built over a geothermal foundation covered in solar windows with a greenhouse on the roof? Yeah, you know, we can do that. And we need to make sure our children know that. Because they are the architects of our future.

Just as someone who visits the Statue of Liberty or the Golden Gate bridge hasn’t “seen America,” I still haven’t “seen Texas”. This little thumbnail of southeast Houston is like seeing only the cornerstone of a great pyramid, or a lone star out of a ship’s portal. I wish I had the time and the resources to travel and pick out all of the “OMFG awesome” things about this state instead of the negatives, and do that with every locale on the planet.

So, do that today, okay? Find something like that about where you live and talk about it, write about it, get it out there. Take some of the awesome things you do for yourself, for your kids, for non-human animals, for the planet everyday, and share them. Put your money where your heart is. Every person can make a difference. Even if it’s only a deed done for one person today, or one purchase reevaluated, or one unnecessary negative word withheld. Exchange it. Change it. Make it positive.

And for fuck’s sake, use public transportation when you can!

I'm baaaack!

Let's not mess around.

This is my new blog.

This was my old blog of 5 years.

It was full of a lot of this:

There will still be a little of that. But the fact is, I am separated, with my kids only half the time, struggling to make a living as a writer, nanny, and personal chef in one of the most expensive regions of the country, and quite frankly, I want to talk about a lot of other stuff.

Looking forward to comments and a new perspective.

- Krista